When Kareena Kapoor Khan was asked the one thing she wants her kids to grow up with, the Crew actor did not say fame or success. Instead, she chose kindness to be the trait passed down to her next generation — because to her, how you treat people matters more than anything else. On the couch of her talk show, What Women Want, Kareena shared that there’s no blueprint or plan, or a list of qualities to pass on to her children.
“The only thing that I keep telling Saif (Ali Khan, her husband) is that I just want the boys to be kind. Kindness is the most important and beautiful quality a boy or a man can have. And in today’s world, kindness is forgotten, but it is much needed,” she shared, adding, “If you deal with any situation, I tell Taimur, ‘I think you will be a winner, you’ll be fine.’ I just hope they will be kind and gentle.”
Reflecting on Kareena’s statement, clinical psychologist Kamna Chhibber told this publication that kindness is not something that is just related to engaging in actions of doing something for another. Being kind can be demonstrated in the thought or feeling that is accorded to another, the space that is given to them to be their self, to not be judgmental, and to not use your own parameters to determine how another needs to be.
“Furthermore, kindness extends beyond others towards your own self, too. A person needs to allow themselves to experience thoughts, feelings, and situations in the way they do, give space for mistakes, allow for the challenges one experiences, and not constantly judge the actions one engages in,” she said.
Kareena with her family (Source: Instagram/@kareenakapoorkhan)
Here are some ways being kind can help you in life
1) It helps reduce levels of stress and distress. Being kind allows you to be able to give space to others and your own self to go through experiences of life without holding situations or people in judgment. It enables you to be more empathetic and builds understanding of thoughts and feelings, which can enable the reduction in building of distress or stress for an individual.
2) Being kind allows a person to be able to feel more connected to another on account of the greater understanding they may have and the consideration they would have of the other’s situations and experiences. It thus can help forge relationships and build a sense of greater engagement.
3) Kindness is known to generate a feeling of joy and happiness. The act of doing something for another is seen as a virtuous act. It taps into people’s belief systems that come from their upbringing about how people in society should be. It enables people to be able to get perspective from others’ lives and, as a result, can also help a person view things differently, experience reduced levels of anxiousness, or better moods.
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4) Kindness towards the self ensures that you do not constantly judge yourself and feel bad on account of these judgments about the person that you are. Having greater compassion towards the situations of your lives or finding ways to appreciate the efforts you make by reinforcement or reward, shifts the focus from what is not there to what you are able to do. This helps bolster a sense of positivity and optimism.
5) Kindness is an attribute that can help a person feel good about themselves, build confidence, enhance feelings of worthiness, and build self-esteem. Through its positive effects, it can help contribute towards a person’s resilience and is overall able to contribute towards better mental health and well-being.
